The NY Times 'out of touch'? Are you kidding me?

 They've got their finger on the pulse of all of the real American People. And they're cutting off their circulation... 

(There's a newspaper pun in there somewhere...)

I'd pay a dollar or two to spank the livin' fuck outta this gal and maybe - just maybe - pay a little extra to do it on the sidewalk outside the Times building in Manhattan. Juss' sayin'...