The second it drops to 65° in Florida, the entire state acts like we just entered an Ice Age. People waking up in full survival mode. Hoodies. Sweatpants. Somebody pulled out a North Face jacket they bought in 2007 for a trip they never took. There’s a guy at Publix wearing gloves like he’s about to summit Everest. Meanwhile it’s sunny, birds chirping, and the iguana on the fence is just mildly confused.
Neighbors you haven’t seen in months suddenly outside like, “Man it’s COLD today.” Sir - it is 64°, ferfucksake. Someone’s grilling anyway - but now it’s out of defiance, not celebration. Coffee cups replaced the cold drinks. That one guy renting next door who “doesn’t get cold” is still in shorts, but now he’s rubbing his arms like, “Yeah I mean - there’s definitely a breeze.”
Windows open. AC off. This is the one sacred week of the year Florida residents feel financially responsible. Meanwhile up north they’d call this a beach day.
Florida math says anything below 70° is a personal attack. The same people who survived 100° heat index with 90% humidity all summer are now wrapped in blankets like the power went out.
Seasonal mood shift is real. Everyone’s happier - but also dramatically fragile. This isn’t winter. This is Florida’s version of 'winter' that just won't go away...
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Thanks to Florida Hillbilly for the art and inspiration.
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Worked in the freezer of a food warehouse. Went to a college bowl game in Texas. A front went through and temps dropped to the thirties...which was about fifty degrees warmer than what I was used to. Natives walked around so bundled up they looked like perambulating haystacks, while I was wearing jeans, long sleeve shirt, and a jacket. Got the oddest looks.
ReplyDeleteI've been freezin' in Palatka...
ReplyDeleteHad a friend that drove a school bus in Alaska. Temperatures that would have us in parkas, kids there were in shorts and t-shirts.
ReplyDeletePeople are grilling because they need the heat.
ReplyDeleteSho' nuf. I'm in the northern part of the Peoples Republic of Californistan. 'v been wearing shorts since the 9th of March. I only put on long pants today because I was running the weed eater. Life is Great.
ReplyDelete