I was (mis)quoted as saying...

 Things you thought they said but didn't... 

"Elementary, my dear Watson."

Popularly attributed to Sherlock Holmes, but Holmes never said this. He DID say "elementary".. but he doesn't say "my dear Watson."

... 

"Golf is a good walk spoiled." 

Popularly attributed to Mark Twain, but it was first used in 1948 by Harry Truman. Twain died in 1910.

... 

"Wagner's music is not as bad as it sounds." 

Another one many attribute to Mark Twain, but he didn't say it.

... 

"I love the smell of napalm in the morning. It smells like victory." 

Many link this to actor Robert Duvall, in the film Apocalypse Now. What Duvall actually said was, "I love the smell of napalm in the morning. You know, one time we had a hill bombed for 12 hours. When it was all over I walked up. We didn't find one of them. Not one stinking body. That smell - you know, that gasoline smell - the whole hill smelled like victory."

... 

"I have nothing to offer but blood, sweat and tears." 

Winston Churchill? No, he actually said: "I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears and sweat."

... 

"I disapprove of what you say, but I'll defend to the death your right to say it."  

Voltaire (François-Marie Arouet), right? Well, no. It was actually from a 1906 book by Evelyn Beatrice Hall called The Friends of Voltaire. It was written as a paraphrase of Voltaire's attitude, but he never said those words.

... 

You can click on  the picture above to get to Amazon. Even if you're not interested in a specific item I feature, when you get to Amazon from here and find what you want, I still get credit for your visit there. Thanks again - it makes this whole blog thing worthwhile to me!

... 

"Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar." 

Many say these were the words of Sigmund Freud, but they first appeared in 1950, 11 years after he died.

... 

"The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax." 

It sounds like something Albert Einstein might have said, but there's no evidence that he ever actually did.

... 

"Nobody goes there anymore, it's too crowded." 

It sounds like classic Yogi Berra, but that quote actually has been found in newspapers going back to the early 1940s and is first attributed to an obscure woman in Montana.

... 

"I really didn't say everything I said." 

Yes, Yogi Berra really did say that one.

...