Why does the week always have to start on a Monday?

 Thursday would be much better. Juss' sayin'... 

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Didja ever look at an ad and think to yourself  'Do these fuckin' people even know anything about the product they're trying to sell us?   
Because there are some seriously terrible, ridiculous and genuinely insulting ads out there these days, and it makes me crazy. Case in point?


In every ad I've seen from this stupid friggin' marketing campaign, there's one common thread. It's almost impossible to understand what the product is and what the benefits of it might be.
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Brand new knee pads (no roofer ever kneels let alone wear them). 
Uniform hat (They don't work directly for Lowes - they're subcontractors).
Safety harness (not in your wildest fuckin' dreams).
Black guy (Seriously? Not Mexican?).
Brand new nail gun (Never went off the roof? Nah).
Air hose going over wrong side of roof - should always be under you when nailing.
Position is wrong in the first place. It's that way just to showcase the hat.
But go right ahead. Book a FREE consultation today.
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Two sources with knowledge of the federal investigation into the attack told The Associated Press that the criminal enterprise known as DarkSide is behind it. DarkSide launched a ransomware attack against Colonial, which involves paralyzing company networks before demanding a large ransom to undo the damage.
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Well, Forrest, that's not true. All of the idiots in ads on TV - like the Emu guy - are all white. Hmmmmmm.
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C'mere hon - I got somethin' you can do with just one arm...
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You should know by now that this is the knife 
I carry every day of my life. 


It's on sale today for under $23.00. That is a great price.


Take a look at this knife and see if it wouldn't 
be the perfect pocket knife for you:
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So she killed at least two people and she's doing 20, but I guess she will get out at some point if she's only on that one sentence. How much sense does that make?
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This was a TV ad where she kept taking her sweater off over her head and every once in a while she'd become this black girl. How fuckin' stupid is that?
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Copy said it was Raquel Welch. 
I don't see it - do you?
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I pledge to you right here and now that if anyone I know buys one of these I personally will beat them within an inch of their lives.
 That is the singularly most stupid fuckin' looking thing maybe ever made. Ever. Get my point?
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A sky trooper from the 1st Cavalry Division keeps track of the time he has left on his “short time” helmet, while participating in Operation Pershing, near Bong Son during the Vietnam War, 1968
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If you're over 30, you should be 
taking a good multivitamin. 
This is the one I take religiously every day.


Find out more about them by clicking 
on the picture or this link:
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Lesley and Felix - The animal trainer and the toad.
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Did they somehow not know the guy was a flaming jackass 
when they voted for him?
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I could use about a month of this.
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Ya see - now THAT is just fuckin' brilliant advertising. Don't know if it sold any sandwiches, but fuck - if you can get away with it, why not try, right?
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Everywhere ya go there's another scandal.
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To be honest, winning something like this would NOT fuck my life up.
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When's the last time you bought yourself a good shaving kit? If you're gonna be traveling again, maybe it's time to treat yourself to something new...


Maybe now's the time. Get this one here:
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That's Janet Leigh - Jamie Lee Curtis' Mom. Now ya get from where she got to be such a major babe?
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This was one of the best TV ads ever made, but guess what? People are such idiots, they thought the Alka-Seltzer was giving the guy the agita and sales of the product went down as a result.
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4 comments:

  1. Copy said it was Raquel Welch.
    I don't see it - do you?


    I can't quite tell. If I could kiss her I could give you a solid answer.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Like you've done that before? Okay...........................

      Delete
  2. Smart money says the pipeline attack was by Greens. Or maybe even the Feds. Remember: Oil BAD!!!

    ReplyDelete

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